Down Time

Woah it has been a while since I wrote something .... I have been a busy woman latly and have not been online alot ... I have been preparing for the season to come ... trying to make the healthiest choices possible in some impossible situations .... I have been having some down time with my workouts which I hate ...  I messed up my back and it do not seem to want to get better ... well it has no choice ... this week is going to be the start of getting back to my kettlebells ... they are calling me and I miss them sooo much ... so at least 4 KB workouts this week ... and some fun activities on the wii and more .... I would love to get alot more weight off for this summer ... I see 7 months til summer ... even if I lose 10 lbs a month ... thats 70 lbs by summer!!I think that is doable!!

No Regrets

Throughout childhood I was teased every single day for being the fat kid.... I was never "Normal" sized and would never fit in....  I ask myself sometimes if I regret being fat.... although I did not have that much control .. and my answer is No ... why would I??  I believe it has made me the person I am today!! ... I believe all the Bullying and Pain I went through as a child and young adult has built the structure and foundation of my personality today... I do not believe that I would be who I am without the teasing and depression of my youth... people say you learn through experiences and through experiences I have learned alot... I have learned that looks mean nothing ... Looks do not define a person and Beauty runs deep inside .... I have learned that it does not matter what ones profession is or what education one has ... it does not matter where a person lives or how they live.... it does not matter who they love or what they love ... we are all human ... all the same ... so why do people feel the need to Bully others ... to put them down to a lower level emotionaly than they feel... I guess through their own regrets and insecurities they feel the need to make others feel worse than themselves ... Now as I embark on this journey to shed the layers of my past choices I am becomming stronger .. not only my body ... but in my mind as well .... every insult and every moment of depression because of those insults were worth it ... I wouldn't be half the person I am today without them.... so to all the Bullies out there ..Although I Def do not agree with what you did... thank you for helping me Become the person I am today with no regrets and lots of strength!!

No More Excuses

So many times in the past I have tried and was unsuccesful ... at one thing or another I woukld always make an excuse to not do it today ... and put it all off ... I have done this with weight loss sooo many times and have givin up after soo long ... why did I do this??  ... was I afraid of success??  was I afraid I would get too much attention??  was I lazy??  ... I cannot answer those questions ... I don't really know why?? I think somthing deep inside is afraid of failure tho... I guess that is a given... the what if I do this and then gain it back like so many b4 me ... or what if I get so far and then give up again ... But you know what ... for some reason ... this time it is different ... I feel different mentally and physically ... I feel like I can do it this time ... I look forward to the smaller clothes, the easier walks and runs, the more active lifestyle ... yet I take it one day at a time ... the decisions I make today affect tomorrow and tomorrow the next day... I make a decision every day to be healthy and to be a better version of myself!! It is a slow process but will totally be worth it!!  I am winning my life and will be healthier than I have been in my whole life!! 

Running For Life

I Ran for the cure On Sunday!!  Even though I didn't sleep well It felt great!!  I have never been able to run really fast and have even struggled with walking in the past without getting winded ... this time I ran as much as I could around people ... there was 3500 people there and I got stuck somewhere in the middle and it was hard to get around some people ... Hills are still not my Best friends but as I was walking the hills in the run I was reflecting on the past ... I used to get just as winded walking in the past on flat land or even going down hill as I was walking up that hill ... even more so ... I seen that I came far and am still working on getting better... There were 3 hills on the walk ... the first was the hardest ... the second not as bad ... and the third I was almost to the top b4 I realized I was walking it ... there were soo many people who took shorter paths .. who cut off the road and went on the trail so they could avoid that last hill ... I was def not going there ... to me that was cheating .. not that there was strict rules as it was not a "Race"  more a charity event!!  .... the last 1/2 km the roads were all torn up due to the recent hurricane so I had to take my time due to all the "ankle Twisting" rocks ...  but the finish line was on pavement so I ran across the finish line ... I was soo surprised that the biggest shirt they had was a XL ... so I took it ... tried it on .. and  it fit ... I was sooo surprised (I think they are a big make tho) ... I did it it under an hour 54 mins to be exact .... I am proud ... next year it will be alot faster!!

Some Days You Just Need To Rest

You Work Hard Everyday  to try to reach your goals and live up to your expectations... you give what you can and do what you can to help yourself and others get through the day!  Your days are filled to the brim with I gotta get this, this and that done plus juggling Family, workout, school, work, hobby... Some Days You just have to rest ... and today Rest I did... OK,  Breathe

Running For The Cure

I try to help out in any way I can to as many charities as possible... Unfortunatly I do not have alot of cash to go around so I look for more creative and inventive ways to Help... aka the Run for the Cure or Donating My Hair... anything I can do to help I try to do!!  I am a person who believes that one person Do Make a difference ... even though most people do not believe this I do... People say what is the difference will it make if I help... Imagine the whole world said that ... the world would not develop... would not advance ... we would still have Small Pox and Polio to worry about ... I believe every person has the ability to make a difference in this world something even as simple as smiling at a stranger ... you do not know where they have been today ... Maybe seeing that there is some good left in this world ... that a stranger took the time to actually give a gesture of kindness and acknowledgement that they are there will bring them up out of whatever slum mood they may be in...   I think there is kindness in everybody but sometimes it gets lost deep inside and the simple gestures of their surroundings may be what makes the difference in a good day and a bad day!!! give it a try sometime ... a simple smile ... and a hello .... or hold the door for someone the little free things in life that make more of a difference than you will ever know!! 

Hard Work And Dedication

Hard Work and Dedication are the two most important things in any journey In My Opinion!!  You have to be willing to work every day towards what you want most and focus on that rather than what you want right this second.. you have to be dedicated to what works for you ... whatever system, program, lifestyle that Fits your body and your mind... some people like to do things alone... I on the other hand like to have support ... and somehow support from people who are not family of friends (in the beginning anyways) help more... I don't know if anyone else agrees but for me its good to have someone who has been in your shoes, who has tried sooo many times as you and have had the same hiccups as you in your journey ... someone to relate to ... I am not saying that support from family and friends is not welcome and accepted ... in fact it is wonderful ... but it is kind of expected if you know what I mean... but when people who do not know you but do know you on a deeper level because they have been there give you support and encouragement to go the extra mile it means alot ... it means that they know where you are and what you are capable of ... they are not just standing on the sidelines cheering you on they are right beside you running their own race...

and are willing to pick you up when you fall flat on your face!!  Helping people is one thing I have always been passionate about in my life and now I have the opportunity to help the people who have started after me ... to tell them my experiences and assure them that things do get easier!!  Hard work Definatly Pays off and Dedication to this lifestyle will definatly be worth while as I see the Outer Layers Melt away......

How do I do it?

Alot of people have said to me latly How do you do it??  How do I get the motivation to workout and keep eating the good foods and not eat the bad ones??  Well the only thing I can say is that I just do it ... I am human... I cannot say I don't crave certain things BUT the difference now is that I know what giving into those cravings do to me and my body... I know it is soooooo easy to fall off track and back into my old ways and this time is going to be my last time cause I refuse to let old habits back in... How do I Not want sweets and goodies.... well right now I am obsessed with reading labels ... there are certain warning signs there that point to fat ... like salt and sugar and White flour ... you would be surprised where they stick stuff in for no apparent reason.  My body feels alot better now than it ever has eating all the garbage I was before ... speaking of garbage ... our garbage bags per week are way lower since this lifestyle has found me... One of the best motivations it the physical difference I see in me ... I can see definition .. I can see my Shoulders .. I can see Muscles I didn't even know I had... my clothes are fitting better and my energy is higher.... Motivation is hard at times when you are "Not In The Mood"  to workout ...

c'mon we are all human and we all have our off days ... but if I have a day like that I FORCE myself to do it anyway and you know what??? I feel 100% better after ... If you do not want to ... do it anyway.. it is totally worth the effort ... as for the junkier foods I see them now and sort of cringe ... It kind of makes me think why would I do that to me?? ....So I don't!!  

I just look at where I want to be and How I am going to get there ...... Now that I know How ,, I am getting there one swing at a time!!!

                                                     

Finally Success

I have tried every diet out there .... extreme to the not so extreme ... with no luck .... yes I lost weight ... but it didn't stick ... I did keep the weight off ... but never did I keep the plan up ... because it was just that ..... A diet .... I couldn't of found live fit at a better time in my life .... I had just agreed to do a 10 mile run next year Exausted all diet exersise plans out there and was totally aprehensive to how I would do this .... Now I know there is No Diet that works .... not for me anyway ... I had a realization , a light bulb if you will .... I need to change me ... not only physically but mentally ... its all in the attitude ... sooo I made a lifestyle change ... and it is changing my life .... I started live fit 11 days ago and am down 11 pounds already ... so I guess I have found what works for me ..... having a trainer and alot of support that helps me stay accountable ...  but most of all it is me ... I have changed inside and out ... I now realize it is my time to do something about it instead of sitting and talking about it and right now I feel proud that I am sticking with it ... and I feel like I look forward to my workouts and I have found the obligation that is within me to make myself proud .... every day!!!

New Start

A little over 2 weeks ago I decided to take on the live fit reveloution Challenge ... it is alot easier than I though it would be ... four days of working out a half hour cardio a day and a cardio challenge on the weekend!! I have an eating plan that is more flexable than any plan I have been on before so it seems to work for me!! ... as with every lifestyle change it comes with challenges ....I have to eat whats on the menu ... I have choices of what veggies and protine I want but what do I do with them.... years of processed foods had my mind warpped into not knowing how to cook ... After a first day of salad and a tasteless wrap of chicken and lettuce I made the decision to cook ...

With no recipies just my ingredients and my spice rack ... Each day now I am creating dishes that have taste... with no salt ...

   The Next challenge is Apple Cider Vinegar.... Ugh ... it is a super food that helps you with Numerous health benefits and it is worth the taste ... but how do I suffer this one out?? ... well Solution # 2 ... I have purchased some Bengal Spiced Herbal Tea... I add my ACV and it is like a hot Apple cider Drink ....

Another challenge is ... this weeks Cardio challenge was Stairs... find a place that has lots of stairs and do them ... well in a smaller town there are not alot of the same amenities as in a big city ....

 Solution # 3 .. work with what you have... one thing this town does have is alot of hills ... so on my daily hill walk today I walked the hill like it was a set of stairs ...

lifting my legs more and a longer stride.... wow that hill felt like it was day one again ... so I knew it was working ..... one last dilema is time management ... all the extra working out takes away from the other daily chores .... example right after working out and your all hot and sweaty you do not want to go and put you hands in a hot sink full of dishes .... That one I am still working on ...but I will find balance .... I am feeling better internally since I starting feeding my body what it should be eating ... the menu calls for sooo much food ... I can hardley ever clean my plate .... and I am starting to enjoy creating my meals ... and the apple cider vinegar .. well its getting better ... as for the exercise... it is my daily thing now... I enjoy it ... I look forward to it ... it makes me feel good .. it gives you a high you will never experience with any drug ...... and it keeps your body and mind healthier and happier!!

Taking a Break

As many of you may have realized I have not been around on Facebook or MSN latly... I decided to take a week off ... sort of a mind cleanse to go along with my body cleanse I am working on...  I have found a new program for my weight loss and have been getting myself on track for that and helping myself zone into my healthier me zone.... I think I have finally found my way around it and have finally found the support I need to get through this Journey!! People who I can relate too and have gone through the same toils and tribulations I have and still are going through them!! ... thats the difference with this plan.... you get support .. you are never on your own... and its a different support than calling in to talk to an advisor or anything like that ... it is a support of real people who have been or still are walking in your shoes... The trainer is awesome as well and she gives you one on one support and motivation ... the workouts are all filmed with people just starting out as you are ... all at different levels and you do not feel intimidated at all... I love this program soo far and I am going to stick with it ... if anyone out there in blogger land wants to know more about the program click on the link below

http://www.livefitrevolution.com/

Get up and win the race

I read this poem on a forum I am part of and thought it was soo inspiring ... hope you all like it as well


The Race


(D.H. Groberg)



“QUIT! GIVE UP! YOU’RE BEATEN!” They shout out and plead,

There’s just too much against you now, this time you can’t succeed.

And as I start to hang my head in front of failure’s face,

My downward fall is broken by the memory of a race.

And hope refills my weakened will as I recall that scene.

For just the thought of that short race rejuvenates my being.

A children’s race, young boys, young men; now I remember well.

Excitement, sure, but also fear; it wasn’t hard to tell.

They all lined up so full of hope. Each thought to win that race

Or tie for first, or if not that, at least take second place.

And fathers watched from off the side, each cheering for his son.

And each boy hoped to show his dad that he would be the one.

The whistle blew and off they went, young hearts and hopes of fire.

To win, to be the hero there, was each young boy’s desire.

And one boy in particular, his dad was in the crowd,

Was running near the lead and thought, “My Dad will be so proud.”

But as he speeded down the field across a shallow dip,

The little boy who thought to win, lost his step and slipped.

Trying hard to catch himself, his hands flew out to brace,

And mid the laughter of the crowd, he fell flat on his face.

So down he fell and with him hope. He couldn’t win it now.

Embarrassed, sad, he only wished to disappear somehow.

But as he fell, his dad stood up and showed his anxious face,

Which to the boy so clearly said, “Get up and win that race!”

He quickly rose, no damage done – behind a bit, that’s all,

And ran with all his mind and might to make up for his fall.

So anxious to restore himself to catch up and to win,

His mind went faster than his legs. He slipped and fell again.

He wished that he had quit before with only one disgrace.

I’m hopeless as a runner now, I shouldn’t try to race.

But, in a laughing crowd he searched and found his father’s face

That steady look that said again, “Get up and win the race.”

So, he jumped up to try again. Ten yards behind the last.

If I’m to gain those yards, he thought, I’ve got to run real fast.

Exceeding everything he had, he regained eight or ten,

But trying so hard to catch the lead, he slipped and fell again.

Defeat! He lay there silently, a tear dropped from his eye.

There’s no sense running anymore – three strikes I’m out – why try?

The will to rise had disappeared, all hope had fled away.

So far behind, so error prone, closer all the way.

I’ve lost, so what’s the use, he thought, I’ll live with my disgrace.

But then he thought about his dad, who soon he’d have to face.

“Get up,” and echo sounded low, “Get up and take your place.

You were not meant for failure here, get up and win the race.”

With borrowed will, “Get up,” it said, “You haven’t lost at all.

For winning is not more than this: to rise each time you fall.”

So up he rose to win once more, and with a new commit,

He resolved that win or lose, at least he wouldn’t quit.

So far behind the others now, the most he’d ever been.

Still he gave it all he had and ran as though to win.

Three times he’d fallen stumbling, three times he’d rose again.

Too far behind to hope to win, he still ran to the end.

They cheered the winning runner as he crossed first place.

Head high and proud and happy; no falling, no disgrace.

But when the fallen youngster crossed the line, last place.

The crowd gave him the greater cheer for finishing the race.

And even though he came in last, with head bowed low, unproud;

You would have thought he won the race, to listen to the crowd.

And to his Dad he sadly said, “I didn’t do so well.”

“To me you won,” his father said, “You rose each time you fell.”

And when things seem dark and hard and difficult to face,

The memory of that little boy helps me in my race.

For all of life is like that race, with ups and downs and all,

And all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.

“QUIT! GIVE UP! YOU’RE BEATEN!” they still shout in my face,

But another voice within me says, “GET UP AND WIN THE RACE!”

Small Accomplishments!!

I think the best thing to look forward to are the small accomplishments.... they act as stepping stones towards what you want most in life and your ultimate goals... today I skipped one of my resting points on the hill and it didn't even affect me that much ... I didn't plan it .. it just happend .. I just felt like I could keep on moving and I did!! this shows me that my body is changing for the better and is getting stronger!!  I like it !!  The Smallest accomplishments mean the most in the long run .. without them there would be no end and no reaching the ultimate goal of life ... I think celebrating small accomplishments is important and it helps me focus and helps me realize that what I am doing is working!!... Besides for my long term goal of weight loss and a marathon I have decided to set a goal for myself that is more living the moment right now type of goal .... I have a friend living in Massachusetts, USA ... I have decided ... now that I have my Treadmill to virtually walk there ... see how long it takes me... just for fun and something different to keep me motivated ... according to google maps ... if I walk across the ocean ... It will be a total of 2037 kms  or 1265.73 miles ...  soo wish me luck I will keep you all posted on where I am on my walk .. I think it will be interesting ... would be even cooler if I could see the scenery ... but I guess you cannot have it all ... maybe some day virtual will turn to reality!!  hoppe you all set your own small accomplishments ... they help and work ... I want to say I on;y stopped once on my hill walk ... thats my next goal!!

Back To The Basics

Ahhh the Simple Life!!...This weekend was long and busy but totally worth it... I had a few tasks to do around my parents house which included painting their foundation ... alot of squatting and working of the arms ... espically under the two patios .... we also mowed the lawn which has a steep hill you have to push the mower up and down so another workout!!  We also did a 3.5 hour hike on Flambro Head out the side of the huge cliffs and along the coastline...Not only for the exercise but also to watch the Whales....

 I love nature and all the beauty it has to offer ... just take it all in and relax... there is no drug that can bring you as much happiness as a good hike or stroll in your favorite location ... whether it be downtown in a busy city or on the rugged coastline of your beautiful province... Back to the basics of life .. a healthy way of living for your body and mind ... your body craves the activity ... and your brain it craves the change of scenery and the happiness your favorite place can bring you... Ever since I was a small child I was always the type to roam the local woods, hills, beaches  and cliffs to find the unfound and see the unseen ... I have discovered soo many things when I ventured off the beaten path and into the deeper unroamed areas of the land surrounding me... places to be alone with your thoughts and imagination ....If only we had cameras back then ... but times were simpler back then... there was less fear... kidnapping and coyotes were unheard of... or at least un thought of ... we would walk for an hour to our local swimming spot as kids no parental supervision we didn't need it ... we never drowned and never heard of a drowning ... I would never let my child do it today ... walking on the road alone in the middle of nowhere .. but as I said times definatly have changed... most times we were never asked where we were going ... they knew we wouldn't go far...

I still go out in Nature as often as I can ... explore every time... love going new places and revisiting the familiar spots!! I have a few more places I wish to visit before summer is over just because I have never been there and I want to go there and explore ... it makes for an awesome hike and walk ... so I get my exercise and I get to do what I love!!   

Feels Like Fall

Today was much cooler outside... which was good for my daily Hill conquer ... I walked to the mail today which includes another smaller hill in my climb... I stopped to feed the horses on my way up as always ... they run to me when they see me comming now ... they know they are getting treats and they LOVE it!!  they are very friendly and loving animals and they love their apples and carrots ... The hill climbing is going good .. I am sticking to it completly... the second day I didn't get to do it cause the errands I had to do ran into the darkness and I didn't like to do it in the dark ... but since that day it has been every day .... even in the POURING rain ... and I mean tail end of hurricane rain ... there were rivers of water running down the hill with me ... and as I looked down I seen that I was walking faster than the ripples of water were running.... that was going down the hill now ... which I did find pretty hard at first due to the impact and my toes hitting off the front of my sneakers ... but going down is getting easier... as is going up ... not alot easier yet mind you ... but it is a little easier .... I set goals for myself and each day try to beat them ... like I have to get to that tree going at a steady pace b4 I am allowed to stop to break ... it helps alot and helps me stay focused on getting to that tree rather than to the top right away ... my goal is to get right to the top no breaks no stops and not winded .... a long way to go yes but I'm getting there one step at a time!!

At the goal of my journey

How Will You Reward Yourself??  Once I reach my goal of weight loss I plan on treating myself.. I think everyone should treat themselves beyond the normal buy a new wardrobe and normal things... I plan on getting a Tattoo ... a symbol of my success in this journey ... I would love to go to kat von D to get it.. but right now I do not see that happening .... but you never know.... so I am going to get my first initial tattoo at that time and it will be of.... get ready for this .. a frog..... why a frog??  well first of all I love frogs but the main reason is the symbolisim... the transformation that frogs endure in their life is phenomonal .. its crazy and amazing espically the point that when they are tadpoles they are totally water bound then they develope the ability to live on land .. its awesome!!

Frog Meanings and Symbolism

When the frog jumps into your life it may indicate now is a time to find opportunities in transition. We see animal symbolism of transition with the frog in its unique growth cycle. The frog undergoes incredible transformations to reach the destination of full adulthood, and so do we as humans.

The frog understands what it is like to undergo some serious growing pains – and so it is a fantastic animal totem for teenagers as they sometimes struggle to find their place (in-betwix youth and adulthood) in society.

A quick-list for animal symbolism of the frog includes:
Luck

Purity

Rebirth

Renewal

Fertility

Healing

Metamorphosis

Transitions

Dreaming

Opportunity

Intermediary

As a Celtic symbol meaning, the Frog was deemed lord over all the earth, and the Celts believed it represented curative or healing powers because of its connection with water and cleansing rains. More Western and European views focus on the Frog's three stages of development (egg, tadpole, fully formed amphibian) to symbolize resurrection and spiritual evolution. For these same reasons it is also a common Christian symbol for the holy trinity and resurrection. It is often seen in Christian art to express this symbolism.

In China the Frog is an emblem of Yin energy and thought of as good luck. Feng Shui practices recommend putting an image of a Frog in the east window of your home to encourage child birth and/or happy family life.

Frog energy is also considered to be a link between the living and the dead. An interesting ancient Asian custom was to place a jade frog in the mouth of the deceased to insure his/her spirit would pass safely into the spirit world. This custom was believed to allow the spirit of the deceased to speak more clearly to loved ones still living.

Frogs are also good luck symbols in Japan - especially for travelers. Images or charms were worn during long voyages to assure safety (particularly across water).

The Japanese word for frog is "kaeru." It is the same word meaning "return." So travelers carry a small frog amulet with the intent of returning safely home.   ... I WANT ONE!!!!

Further, small pebble-sized frog amulets are carried in their wallets so money will not be lost.

Ancient Hindus viewed the animal symbolism of frogs on a more cosmic levels, as they believe Frogs projected the world into orbit in space, and the frog was also thought to signify darkness.

Call upon the energy of the frog when:

You need to easily swim through some tough life-transitions

You need a little assurance while traveling

You are working to enhance your intuition, and strengthen your connection with the spirit world

 

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Dont you think we all could ues a little frogginess in our life??
This is a pic of the tattoo I want ... The symbols at the bottom spell Success!! 

Structure

To Say and To Do are two different things... I have this problem sometimes ....  I need structure but sometimes find a structured life difficult and time consuming... I have come up with a solution for the structure problem in my Journey to a healthier me... I have a binder that is Labled MY JOURNEY... inside this binder there are many different colored tabs each with their own level of importance to my Journey....

The first tab with the color of White is recipes ... this is a place for me to print off all the healthy recipes that catch my eye and give them a home ... If I like them they stay ... If I do not like them they go ... simple as that!

Tab #2 .. colored blue is for water.. there is a calendar in this section to track that I drink enough water every day .. again this is something I struggle with daily and need to work on

Tab #3 ...Has the color red... red zone ... makes sense to me.. I have composed a Weekly Meal Tracker  chart for this section ... there is a place for Breakfast, dinner, supper and snackfor each day of the week

Tab #4....Green for GO... is for exercise... again I Have composed a Daily Tracking Exercise chart that asks me every day What I did... to make sure that I did something that day

And Last But Not Least :

Tab #5... Purple for Walking .... I just use a monthly calendar and write in my walking accomplishment for that day

I also purchased star stickers ... the little ones ... if I reach my goal I get a sticker... it show my progress and if I am reaching my goals ... Childish??? maybe... but for me it helps!!

one problem I also find myself struggling with is the "Out of Sight, Out of Mind" concept .... I need to see this binder to actually use it

for me this works better than me trying to keep track of it in my head for now anyway ... it may seem extreame to some but for me right now it is structure! 

Convenience Vs Healthy

I'm Just Gonna Pop something in the Microvave  ... such a common phrase ... such a convenience... soooo easy and in 2 mins you have a meal ready to eat ... if you could call it that..  But wait , Now you can get healthier options for the Microwave ... like lean cuisine and Smart ones ... but are they really healthier ... if you actually compare the healthy ones to the "low Fat " ones are they really that much different... check out the salt content most have more than half the daily intake of salt .... nad have you ever felt full after eating one of these "Tv Dinners"?  they are called entrees for a reason ... I am planning to change certain habits ... change convenience into healthy but still make it quick enough that its not inconvenient ... I plan to choose one day of the week as a prep day ... to make wraps, healthy pizzas, soup, and any other healthy meals that I can for the whole week ,... freeze or refridgerate them and have my own grab and go meals that are fast and convenient minus the preservatives and unnessesary salt.. I think a few hours out of one day of the week beats having to prep every day and when you're not in the mood to cook you have it there at your fingertips to just throw in the microwave and eat within mins.  Convenience and Healthy =  A Happy Me